PANIC AND RAGE

Today has been what I would call a "bad day" unfortunately.

I know I always say I'm tired- I honestly am. Don't know why though. HOWEVER today, I really am SUPER tired. Stayed up until 3ish helping with my mum's work stuff and then staying up further to attempt to finish a bio prac, that I forgot to hand in today anyway.

What I hate- being sent on a wild goose chase. I know cadets is all about following the chain of command (taking the long way) it's a good thing (sort of) but I hate it when people abuse the powers they have. Some people just demand WAY, WAY too much. You can't seriously expect a person to do something here, and something else there AND THEN do another thing somewhere else & on the spot.

Another thing I hate- lack of self discipline. Okay, I confess, I find it hard to control myself when I see chocolate :) HOWEVER I do have the discipline to listen when someone else is talking and not fidget when someone's on stage, with their knees knocking so loudly, it echoes around the lecture theatre. Today, I was totally appalled by the standard of self discipline and respect held by the current cadets. They talk, fidget, tap their pens and laugh when there is a nervous person at the front trying hard to teach a lesson, trying hard control the wild bunch and trying very hard to impress the assessor. Cadets never used to be like this. Maybe it's the absense of Chris Fung. I remember he scared the crap out of me when I was weeny cadet. One of his many threats included sitting on us !! Mmm. Those were fun times.

I don't know why kids don't listen to their parents anymore. I also see lack of respect, which is quite saddening.

Question:

Maybe it's just me, but every single time I go home after being around smokers in the street- second hand-smoking UNWILLINGLY, I feel nausea and I can't smell anything but cigarettes even though none of my neighbours smoke... Does anyone get that? Another thing. I hate people who smoke in public. If you want to smoke (kill yourself), smoke in the car (LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN OUTSIDE) don't smoke in a place where there are other people who probably dislike inhaling disgusting chemicals used in paint. On the weekend, I saw a woman smoking in the car with a baby in the back and ONE window open a tiny bit. How despicable and cruel some people can be. I get so annoyed & agitated by them. It's bad enough you're killing yourself, but your kid?!

Why I hate cigarettes: because some retard burned a hole in my nice cardigan once at HABOURSIDE. WHY oh WHY THE HELL WAS HE STANDING SO CLOSE, I have no idea- I usually cough (no, more like gag) and then walk away. That reminds me. When I was a kid (before school) my mother said that to stop people smoking in the street, I would cough and make gagging sounds really loudly. Yes, I was an embarrassing child. I also happened to slap the owner of Golden Dragon (I think it's the name of the restaurant..) at Chinatown.. but that's another story. Kids can get away with anything.

day twenty

damnit. Assessments. Soon. Damnit. I spend too much time hating on things I can't change in this world.

Thought I lost my KFF, but was in Mr. Mac's office all the time *sigh* I spent ages worrying/ looking for it all day. It drained me of my energy. Not much happened today that is worth noting. Frankly, I don't really ever want to remember today UNLESS I get a one-off chance of FLAMING the person who made my day miserable, SLAP and PUNCH and STAB however much I wanted and finish, by erasing their memory. So I can get away with it.

I feel so aggro today.

Bah, homework calls.

Found a butterfly outside Shaw's office. It was nice, BUT it chose to close it wings when I pressed OK. *sigh* I wish I had my camera :*(

This is a card for James :) His birthday tomorrow. HAPPY SEVENTEENTH! I made a 2 second video that I might post up just for the fun of embarrasing myself. I made it because I feel guilty for the absence of a present. So, I thought ! (thought that counts..) yeah and VIDEO :) 2 seconds.. xD

TOMORROW (I was told TODAY!) I will be going to the Epping Club for the rememberance day service and Davo and I will be laying a wreath. I hope I remember to bring my blazer. Must not forget permission note too! ><; I shall be missing english! (noo Shamus... Samus? Chamus? is a fun teacher :D )

Yeah. Enough babbling from me, 'til next time folks. Cheerios! Let's hope tomorrow will be a brighter day!